by Leon Perry
Here I am writing a blog about my experience with eating chocolate-chip cookies. Basically, I’ve been feeling guilty eating chocolate-chip cookies. There has been a lot of talk about sugar, and how bad it is for the physical body. My first prominent introduction to the effects of sugar is through Desteni. I came across a video of Osho through the Portal talking about sugar, and how sugar prolongs the life of the mind-consciousness system within the physical body. I read this, but didn’t have a clear understanding about how sugar technically affects the physical body. I additionally listened a bit toSugar: The Bitter Truth at a subsequent time — byDr. Robert Lustig in which he breaks down how sugar affects the physical body, and its relationship to obesity. Albeit the information was technical, I still wasn’t satisfied because there was no technical interdimensional-scientific perspective of it from / through Desteni. I simply followed other Destonians, and made a commitment to cut down sugar, but I didn’t see, realize, and understand that I was cutting down sugar — in separation: through knowledge and information rather than within / from a starting-point of self-honesty, and so therefore, I created a GUILT — which is, in fact, an energy-experience of knowing that I have committed some kind of ‘offense’, but when and as I accept and allow myself to exist within guilt, I accept the point of what I am feeling guilty for — to exist, and thus use guilt as a justification of the point — rather than a self-directive ‘movement’ to correct the point in equality and oneness.
Because how can I correct a point through guilt, if I didn’t even make the choice to feel guilty in the first place? If I would have made the choice to feel guilty, I would know and understand the exact origins of how I created the guilt to exist within me in the first place, but if I cannot explain its origin, then I am possessed by it. It’s like a form of ‘channeling a higher being‘. The person / people that are channeling beings do not know exactly where the being comes from, but the person / people strangely put their trust in them anyway for guidance. It is the same as the emotions and feelings that we participate in. So here, I’d like to do self-forgiveness for eating cookies in guilt — not really because of sugar — because I do not know the entire process of how sugar affects the physical body, but what I DO know is that my starting-point for eating sugar is to feel good, and again, how can I trust my feelings / desires — the same as my emotions (such as guilt) if I am not the one directing the feelings, and making a choice to feel a certain way? If I made a choice to feel a certain way, there would be no reason for me to go into / participate in an emotion or feeling because why would I choose to participate in an emotion or a feeling if I am self-directive in my decision making? Because have a look — I am not self-directive when and as it comes to participating in an emotion or feeling because an emotion or feeling is an out-flow of a particular experience that I didn’t direct myself within in the past, and so as a result, I create a ‘relationship’ to the particular experience in the past, and allowed that experience to dictate my response to it — which becomes an emotion or a feeling. Thus, why would I ‘choose’ to become defined by an experience — allowing an experience to create a response within me? So I can see that I use emotions, such as guilt, to attempt to correct my relationship with my ‘desire’ — to have / create / experience a ‘good feeling’ when eating chocolate-chip cookies. So in the next blog, I’d like to do self-forgiveness — for accepting and allowing myself to be / become dictated by ‘desire’ — through the consuming of sugar — which is an out-flow as a ‘feeling’, and to try to correct the point using ‘guilt’ — which is another out-flow as an emotion. The question is, how can I use an ‘out-flow’ (consequence) to correct another out-flow (consequence). Just doesn’t work….. If that was the case, this world would have already been a changed world.