What is fun? What is boredom? Are they separate from us that we have to “desire to have” or be “sad without”?
3 weeks ago, I suggested to L that we go to the restaurant barefooted. He was hesitant at first because from the car park to the restaurant, the road is quite rough. We did it anyway and the people in the restaurant did not seem to notice we were barefooted. This was a random act of madness for that moment.
When we were at a mall 2 weeks ago, L said he liked to do some random acts of madness. We looked at what we can possibly do. I know he has aversion for dirt being put on his face, so to push through, i suggested we put salsa on our face and walk around. He said he changed his mind, so i did it and i walked with him to where we were going to watch a movie. I enjoyed myself. On the way, i tried to put salsa on his face. I asked him later why he did not like to do it then, and he said because it was not the right timing.
He told me the police will stop us if the police inside the mall will see us doing it. I asked him what law will we violate if we do this? He does not know any law on that, so i went ahead.
Fun is NOT something separate from me that i have to have for me to “feel good”, and boredom is not something i “feel” when i am prohibited to do things that give me fun. I am one and equal to the definition i give words.
Points I saw within this:
I forgive myself that i accepted and allowed myself to fear doing what most people are afraid to do
*Aversion for what i considered not a proper thing to do
I forgive myself that i accepted and allowed myself to believe that to do something that is not accepted by society is bad and to do something that will be accepted by society is good
*Belief that there is a right timing for doing random acts of madness
I forgive myself that i accepted and allowed myself to believe there is such a thing as “right timing” to do random acts of madness
I am dirty – I am cleanliness- I am fear – i am no fear
I am one and equal as all life
I am the breath in every moment here
When and as i see myself having aversion to do what is not normally being done by others, i stop – i breath and let go. I realize this is not what is best for me and not what is best for all. I stop participating
When and as i see myself fearing authorities- i stop – i breath and let go. I realise it needs my participation for this to exist . I realize this is not what’s best for me and not what is best for all. I stop participating.
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